Do you know what could be worse than saying hurtful words you don’t mean? It is saying kind words you don’t mean.

While typing “paintings women,” I came across and then chose that painting.

It is titled "Interrupted Reading" by the French painter Jean-Baptiste-Camille Corot and dates back to 1870.

After Googling it, I discovered that it depicted an activity that was popular among women in the nineteenth century, which was reading.

I can say that Corot portrayed a well-dressed woman in a closed environment reading a book. However, her thoughts suddenly interrupted her session and caused her to stop reading and start ruminating.

Accordingly, she appeared confused and maybe sad.

This woman is a mirror for me, and perhaps for you, too, especially when our thoughts, memories, and unforgettable emotions attack us and then make us wander our past and the unknown.

In the lines that follow, I will share with you my thoughts about words and emotions. I will tell you more about the conundrum that changed my perspective on a lot of things.

I love to screenshot the beautiful words that have been said to me. It is an act of documenting the lovely and significant moments in my life.

I do this so I can go back and revisit these moments in case life throws me a curveball with its built-in system.

While some may contend that they are merely words, I am among those who view words as a gateway to a wider range of ideas, beliefs, and feelings.

Maya Angelou, the American memoirist and poet, said, “I’ve learnt that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

She was discussing how some people’s use of cruel language can leave us feeling unhappy and disappointed.

She was describing the power of language and the scars we might hold after speaking with someone.

In my opinion, we might linger on Maya’s statement and say that, although we may not remember the precise, beautiful words we hear from other people, we are unable to forget the emotions that went along with these words.

Relief, happiness, love, connection, motivation… An endless list.

Emotions blossom. They start from bodies, then travel to brains where feelings are born before going back again to bodies where we notice, name, and sit with them.

Emotions adore emotions. The more we experience a feeling, the more we get used to it, the more we invest in it, and the more it becomes a significant part of our lives.

That’s why we can’t easily forget emotions; they occupy the map of our memories, build neural pathways with their IDs in our minds, tattoo their sensations on different parts of our bodies, and are automatically evoked when the time is right.

And that’s also why we should be mindful of our words, whether they are bad or good.

I say “good” because I met — and believed — those who love to say a good word without meaning it. They just say it.

Perhaps because they are accustomed to being the good folks. Perhaps because they want to kill time, show off, or perhaps because they are just nice.

And niceness is not the same as kindness. The former has the odorous reputation of manipulation and control, while the latter embodies true love and appreciation.

Niceness emerges from minds while kindness settles in hearts. Both are always at each other’s throats; both are the two parties of the old conflict between ego and authenticity.

The problem arises when we mistake nice words for acts of kindness and love, forgetting that they are just nice words.

When this happens, the beautiful feelings of these words that we have stored in our bodies and minds become a heavy burden.

We start questioning our worth, pondering the circumstances, rereading the nice lines again and again while asking, “So, was it just a lie… but why?” Then, we repeat the old scenario in which we are poor and unlucky in love.

At this point, we may realise how naïve and foolish we are and how false hope can lead us astray.

Bad ends are awful. Breakups are awful. Indifference is awful. Even the tiny gesture of pulling away is also awful.

All of these adversities, with their harsh feelings, are awful. However, those who come abruptly after mulching nice words over our hearts are the cruellest ones. They resemble someone who has been cuddling us for a long time before letting go and leaving us tumbling down to the ground.

They are the cruellest because it is easy and even healthy to remove resentment and disappointment, while it is fatal and killing to uproot relief or happiness and then see them as a big lie.

I once wrote on my Facebook page, "Do you know what could be worse than saying hurtful words you don’t mean? It is saying kind words you don’t mean." One of my friends commented, "I still believe that I deserve those kind words even if the sayer didn’t mean it."

He was right. We all are worthy of love, of appreciation, and of respect, and our emotions are important and always valid.

I know what your mind might say now, especially if you once had the same experience. I am aware that this is not as simple as it seems. Decisions/words are easy as long as they are just in our head, but once they touch reality, they become like an elephant on our chests.

However, I believe that I and you, too, deserve all the kind words with their sincere intentions and true meaning regardless of the niceness of the sayer.

Albert Einstein said that “the most important decision we make is whether we believe we live in a friendly or a hostile universe”. So, it is merely our choice, our beliefs about the world we live in. Is it hostile or benevolent?

I love to put my faith and hope in a friendly and kind world. I hope you always hear kind words from those who are honest and considerate, who are kind and generous, who love and care, who listen and support, and who are able to put their hearts before their heads.

Maybe it is also a call to you to be more kind, more present, and more authentic; to believe that you always deserve true love; to stop treating the present with the tools and experiences of the past; and to be mindful of your words and always say what you wholeheartedly mean.

Thanks for reading.
Sending you my love 💓.

Love writing? 🥰
Join Beedium 🐝 and discover tools that will make your articles better! ✨

Sweet.pub is a family - 💚 Short, 💙 Long, 💜 Niche, and 🧡 Deep.
Discover the stories that will make your 🤍 beat!

This article was published on April 9th, 2025 in Deep. Sweet. Valuable. publication.

Spoken Words and Unforgettable Emotions was originally published in Deep. Sweet. Valuable. on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.